Saturday, April 4, 2015

My story: Hated from birth and my journey to enlightenment

Hello world,

Welcome to my blog. I decided to create this page to reach lovely people who are secretly struggling with life. Life is hard and it can truly suck at times. I'm no Debbie downer but I can get real. I've practiced the Secret and whilst I saw some modest gains, I noticed some pot holes in the whole ideology. I've tried the whole "fake it until you make it" and frankly felt nothing but like a dirty fraud inside. How stressful it is for society to EXPECT us to be happy and perfect all the time. People ask me how I am and I still feel pressured to lie. How could I pretend that everything was ok when I was feeling depressed and anxious inside? Little did I know that my true feelings would become my greatest gift.

I've finally made peace with the fact that my life was terrible pretty much from the start and it's time to share my story.

My childhood was far from picture perfect. I am told that I was born late, heavy and difficult. I was an unwanted child and by the time my mother discovered she was pregnant it was too late for an abortion. She desperately wanted a son and I felt hated for being a girl. My upbringing was full of sickness, eating disorders, violence, abuse, abandonment, fear and depression. Often times the pain of her rejection led me to suicide attempts. I felt isolated and as if a dark cloud haunted me everywhere. I shied away from people because I seriously believed I was cursed. When I finally reached the end of my rope, I fled to London with little more than £600 to my name and no job. At 21, I followed my instincts, pushed through the fear and trusted that I had the power to transform my life.
9 years have since past and whilst I've made many mistakes (and deviated from my path) I gradually saw my deepest wishes unfold. I have now discovered that there is more to life than getting the dream job or perfect life companion, it's about having an honest and loving relationship with yourself. 

Despite everything, you hold the key to your own destiny. And I would be honoured to help you on your journey.

Much love,

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